Author: bigmeansweatydyke

nentindo:

holyflamingo:

nentindo:

Hecookinsexual: sexual attraction to a partner only when HE COOKIN

Heeeeeey look at this more memes making fun of ace/arospec people I fuckin love it 🙂 Thanks please invalidate me some more 🙂 Mm yes this would be funny if we were just laughing at ourselves but everyone fuckin knows at this point that we’re having a good laugh at (mostly neurodivergent) kids trying to figure themselves out 🙂 Boy oh boy more absurdist attraction jokes so we can brush all that confusion and pain under the rug 🙂 Hahaha those “actually cishets” trying to sneak into the community amirite? 🙂

HE COOKIN!!!!!

fuzzynecromancer:

literallyaflame:

when i was a little kid, i didn’t care for movies. my parents always admonished me for sitting too close to the screen or fidgeting too much, so i turned to books instead. when i was four, i tried to watch the first harry potter movie. i absolutely loved it, but it wasn’t enough for me. i had to get my hands on that book. the teachers at pre-school said it was a horrible idea, but i read the first two books anyway.

then came kindergarten. the teachers scolded my parents for letting me bring novels to school. “she can’t possibly understand them,” they said. so they gave me tests on the books. i made perfect scores on all of them. i preferred books to movies and television; movies didn’t do justice to the stories i loved.

so, they marked me down as a “gifted child.” they tested my IQ and everything. i was the perfect student, in their eyes. i sat in the front and listened to the teachers as intently as i could.

one day after school, i ran up to my mother and hugged her. then, i turned my head and saw my mother walking towards me. i looked up at the woman i had hugged. “you’re not my mother,” i said, astutely.

my mother, a clever woman, thought to have my eyesight tested. turns out, i had horrible vision. somewhere around 20/450. functionally blind without glasses. not ideal for anyone, especially a six year old.

all my life until that point, people thought i must be some sort of brilliant prodigy, eschewing television and movies for more intellectual pursuits, but actually i just couldn’t fucking see lol

This took a different direction than I was expecting.

unheavenlycreature:

bellahadidthat:

yeezyslides:

yeezyslides:

i jus realized how amazing vaginas r

not only can they expand wide enough 2 release a whole ass coconut headed baby they can be used a built in purses. the girls in prison prolly get away with a lot of contraband like they could have a phone and be like “wow lemme put this up my snatch” and not get caught like omg

sis don’t try to hide things in your pussy it will end badly don’t ask me how i know just trust me on this 

in high school I hid weed in my pussy when I got sent to the principals office WOULD RECOMMEND